Lather, Rinse, Repeat

I spent the last half of my night shift at work last night sitting in the Duty Office, watching spiders the size of small dogs waltz across the floor.

If there is anything to know about dealing with a person with Borderline Personality Disorder, it is that they win and you lose. Period. No amount of pure hearted limit-setting is adequate--in fact, it is about as effective as a rabbit on the highway facing down a Mack truck. As a nurse, I tried to set limits with such a client yesterday, and this person made an unfounded allegation which put me on Alternate Assignment. I was given the choice of going home, or sitting out the shift in the Duty Office.

Something I had never previously recognized where I work is how close to God the Duty Officer is. One is careful what to say to them. But I also learned to recognize how tough their job is. Their word is law. In any case, fortunately I can be easily amused.

Since I have today and tomorrow as my regularly scheduled days off, I have some time to reflect and to say the Remover of Difficulties prayer in hopes of improving my situation. My boss comes back from vacation tonight, and will contact me tomorrow with whatever alternate work assignment has been found for me. And I will no doubt have interviews to explain my feeble reasoning and foolish, noble-hearted motivations for my choices last night [which are too complex and confidential to explain in a blog.] Suffice it to say that Autism Spectrum Disorder strikes again. I am praying to lift this Mack truck out of my path.

So, every time I say multiple repetitions of the Remover of Difficulties, I see the prayer in a whole new way, as mentioned in previous postings. To review, this is a short, simple prayer from the Baha'i Writings:

Is there any Remover of Difficulties save God? Say: Praised be God! He is God! All are His servants, and all abide by His bidding!

~ The Bab

Tonight, the image which came to me as I repeated this was of all impurities being lifted out of me in the first half of the prayer, and the light of God shining down and purifying everything in the last half.

Lather, rinse. Repeat.