Light and Mercy

Tests are outwardly fire and vengeance, inwardly light and mercy. This is because every test in this world that we meet is a great opportunity to develop and strengthen inner, spiritual qualities needed in the next world. A month or two ago I stood in line at the US Bank housed in the Albertsons store that had more business for about half an hour than personnel to meet its needs. One of the gentlemen in front of me was an endless font of complaint and criticism. I refrained from pointing out to him that standing in line was a priceless opportunity to develop patience. Somehow I didn't think he would be receptive; I couldn't figure out a wording that would not come out hideously smug.

After reading Roger's comments which led to reading his pilgrimage journal from a year ago [see comments on previous blog] I am even more fired up about going on pilgrimage. The tests I have been receiving in the past month seem geared to purifying my spirit. At work the other day [I work in a SNF, aka a nursing home] I became so frustrated with new admissions requiring oxygen and not having any concentrators available for them, I ended up invoking the name of Jesus Christ in a spirit of complete frustration. The incoming Agency nurse, overhearing this, responded in a very haughty tone, "Praise His name!"

Naturally one cannot fault someone for objecting to swearing. Perhaps I should have asked her, "What are your favorite words?" Anyhow, swearing is one of those habits which is hard to reverse. Like putting toothpaste back into the tube. I wish I had thought of that whenever I adopted it. One tries to come up with alternative phrases and words. I'm thinking of learning some innocent foriegn phrases, such as "pass the salt," which I can say when the chips are down. I can leave the impression I said something naughty, release my anger, and have the satisfaction of knowing my imprecations were totally innocent. Ooh, maybe something from the speech of Mordor. Hmm.

As I commented to Earthlink one time when I was bumped off the dial-up one too many times, this sucks monkey eyeballs. Although I thought it was ridiculous and hilarious at the time, they responded that there was no reason for abusive language. There is just no pleasing some people.