The Camel

My situation is that, back when everyone else was doing it, I took out two interest-only mortgages on a house we all loved that I could barely afford, with the purpose of acting like extended family to Pearl and Charles, who had lots of love and wanted to get married, and were enrolled in college so potentially had a great future together.

A roomy house with a yard, good for grandkids. The plan was they would both graduate with somewhat lucrative careers, able to afford the house between two salaries; I'd eventually refinance, quit claim out, and move on. I haven't gotten around to refinancing, my house has lost value, and there is very little equity. This is a situation. Not to mention the cats. Not to mention my husband living somewhere else. This would make weird fiction. It is too goofy to make up.

I've always claimed that I kept digs in Tacoma, not moving to Eatonville fully, because of the house here and my "kids." [Charles will always be my son, in my heart.] Interestingly, this is possibly the first time in my life everything's fallen apart and it wasn't me losing a job. Except for my divorce, and that was a good thing.

Eatonville is a problem. Enayat's housekeeping and hoarding are a shambles. I can't see how I could have the time and energy to clean it up and keep it clean without his participation. I have one stunning jewel of a room I took over and redecorated for my own sanity: my sewing room. Enayat may enter, with permission, but not take any objects into my sewing room.

So my first thought was, "I need to find an apartment in Tacoma."

I think this is why one of my new totems is a camel: I have to carry the whole load myself, both with my family and with my husband.